5 days ago I found out that I’d been nominated for the Sunshine Blogger Award which is an award given to bloggers by bloggers. I feel very honoured and incredibly happy to have been nominated for this award. I work hard to build relationships and connections within the blogging world and outside of it. I’ve made some absolutely fabulous connections in my time writing SayIDoOnABudget, and some of the best connections I’ve made have been with other bloggers.
Aylssa is a hairstylist, MUA and an event planner as well as writing her own wedding blog from her base in Columbia, MO. She is one of the busiest people I think I’ve ever met yet she always seems to find time to help others in the blogging community.
The Sunshine Blogger Award is given to bloggers who are creative, positive and inspiring.
As our first anniversary draws closer I feel further and further away both actually in regards to time past, but also mentally, from my wedding day. I have never claimed to have a good memory, but I did hope I would remember more of the day than I feel I do, at only less than a year since.
When I try to remember the day, I can walk through it in my head as a time line of what happened, but it feels hard to bring some of it to the front of my mind the way I imagine those with better memories can.
This poor ability to remember things makes me so grateful for this blog. Even though I’ve rarely discussed my feelings in posts, I have discussed facts, meaning I can use past posts to help me recall the facts of the day if not my feelings.
It is exactly 9 weeks until my first wedding anniversary. Which has got me thinking… what do I get him as a present?
It can’t be anything too expensive as we are currently saving very hard with the view of us getting on the property ladder soon. We also agreed to buy each other “traditional anniversary gifts”.
Have you tried to find out what the traditional gifts are for each year of marriage? If you have you probably came across the same problem we did. That there are a couple of versions out there and it is hard to know which one is correct.
Well after much searching, the list we’ve decided to use is as below. Meaning the first gift we’re to get each other is something Paper.
Over the past 10 years I’ve had blonde highlights streaked through my hair, a thick slab of red, I’ve had some of my hair dyed blue. I’ve gone pretty close to black and had my hair dip dyed in 2012. Ignoring the colour though I’ve pretty much had the same hair style for over 10 years. Sometimes I had it all one length, and other times I’ve had layers cut in, but for the past 10 years my hair has been around a certain length – somewhere between middle of the shoulder blade and bra strap.
The longer my hair got the more I found myself just putting it up in a messy bun, rather than having it down because when it was down it had a tendency to fall in front of my face, in a cousin-it fashion any time I tilted my head even slightly downwards.
If you don’t know about the
#weddinghour chat that is on Wednesday evening then you either don’t have Twitter or have been living under a rock! #Weddinghour is an hour long Twitter chat every Wednesday 9pm-10pm.
But there used to be other wedding chat hours too. There was #BrideHour every Thursday evening 8pm-9pm and #weddingoclock on Sunday evening 9pm-10pm. It would seem that both the
#weddingoclock and #bridehour chats have completely stopped; you try looking at the tweet results for those hashtags now and all you’ll see is the occasional tumbleweed.
But who wants to have only one day a week where they can engage in a Twitter chat about everything wedding? I know I don’t!
It probably isn’t a surprise to you that the ceremony IS THE WEDDING in my eyes. Without the ceremony it wouldn’t be a wedding – it’d just be an expensive party. I’ve done a number of posts on how you can personalise your ceremony such as this one from 2015 and this one from 2012, and I always mention how I well up listening to a couple say their vows to each other.
The husband and I including personal vows in our ceremony was something I wasn’t going to negotiate on. In the UK you have to say certain vows to make the marriage legal, although you get to choose which legal vows you say from a pack the registry office/church give you. These vows can be incredibly beautiful on their own, but I wanted to write extra vows ourselves so we could say our own personal promises to each other.
What I did not realise, is how difficult writing your own vows can be. Every time I sat to think what I wanted to promise him my mind went blank. After quite a bit of time though we both manged it, and I’m incredibly proud of the vows we gave each other.
On the lead up to our first Valentines I made the mistake of saying I didn’t want him to get me anything cheesy (think massive teddies, roses, chocolates etc) which he took to mean, don’t get me anything at all. Come Valentines Day I got him a card and personal dog tags and some other bits while I got nothing in return; not even a card. I was a bit surprised as my thinking at the time was he would think outside the box and get me something a bit different to normal. I was wrong. All her heard was “don’t get me anything“.
The next year I’d learnt from my mistake the previous year; I told him I would like him to buy me something but just not a massive teddy as I’ve no where to put it.
Since then we’ve had years where we’ve simply bought each other a card and eaten an M&S dine in 2 for £10 meal, and one year where we actually had dinner out together on Valentines day.
It’s not that we’ve been unable to afford to celebrate Valentines day or that either of us in anti-Valentines. It’s just that most years neither of us is overly fussed about celebrating the day.
Today we both went to work, giving each other a kiss goodbye and this evening I cooked us dinner and we’ve relaxed in front of the TV. Not a card, a bar a chocolate or a flower exchanged. This is the first Valentines day where we’ve not done anything at all, where neither of us has bought anything for the other.
I’m not sad, not angry, I’m not jealous of the women who received flowers at work today and I’m not being a martyr. It’s not because we’re unhappy together, because we’re boring or due to us being skint. We both love a celebration, and we aren’t grumpily saying we’re not celebrating it because it’s hallmark day, or because it is ‘forced shows of affection’.
Simply, last week, I said, “next week is Valentines day. Do you want to celebrate it?”, he shrugged, and I said I wasn’t bothered about it, so we’ve both not done anything.
Having said that we are going out for dinner soon, most likely next weekend as this weekend we’re helping my sister move house… so we’ll be treating that as our ‘Valentines day’.
How have you spent your day? Do you celebrate it in a big way or do you not tend to bother either?