It probably isn’t a surprise to you that the ceremony IS THE WEDDING in my eyes. Without the ceremony it wouldn’t be a wedding – it’d just be an expensive party. I’ve done a number of posts on how you can personalise your ceremony such as this one from 2015 and this one from 2012, and I always mention how I well up listening to a couple say their vows to each other.
The husband and I including personal vows in our ceremony was something I wasn’t going to negotiate on. In the UK you have to say certain vows to make the marriage legal, although you get to choose which legal vows you say from a pack the registry office/church give you. These vows can be incredibly beautiful on their own, but I wanted to write extra vows ourselves so we could say our own personal promises to each other.
What I did not realise, is how difficult writing your own vows can be. Every time I sat to think what I wanted to promise him my mind went blank. After quite a bit of time though we both manged it, and I’m incredibly proud of the vows we gave each other.
Here are my tips on how to go about writing your own vows:
- Before you go anywhere near a search engine, sit and think about what makes your relationship unique, and what silly little things are features of yourself, your partner and your relationship. Note these things down.
- Note down little things he does for you that you’re thankful for.
- Jot down what sort of things you’d like to promise your loved one.
- When taking notes of all these things don’t worry about wording it in any set way, and don’t worry about if the things you’re jotting down are things you definitely want to include in your final wedding vows. This is your initial ideas stage.